Because it’s an entirely different language
If you’ve ever been in the corporate setting, you know there’s an entirely different language being spoken there. It’s not just technical terminology and definitions; it’s a jumble of words that mean something completely different inside a company building than when they’re uttered outside of it.
Anyone that’s worked outside of this world knows the difference. Those that have always been in corporate don’t know how meetings go without this type of jargon being jumbled in. This contrast is funny and honestly something that’s fun to make fun of, but we have to understand that this is just the way things go. And more importantly, we need to learn it to survive the corporate life.
So. How well do you speak corporate? Would you survive a meeting with the CEO, CFO, COO and CMO of a big corporation?
1. Let’s start easy. What does TBD stand for?
Answer: B, to be determined. Can be used for a meeting venue that hasn’t been booked yet or a tagline that’s yet to be picked.
2. From a marketing stand point, what does TM stand for?
Answer: D, target market. This is usually thrown around when a company wants to release a new offer and marketers are tasked to brainstorm the proper plan.
3. What does GTM stand for when you’re planning a new project?
Answer: A, go-to-market. This is most often used during a marketing meeting wherein certain individuals present a plan for a project that is to reach the general public/clients.
4. What does BAU mean in servicing companies?
Answer: B, business as usual. This means you just go about your job as you normally should.
5. In terms of assessment, what is KPI?
Answer: C, key performance indicator. This is valuable when assessing how effectively objectives are met.
6. If, during a presentation, someone were to say, “Now let’s double click this data right here,” what would they mean?
Answer: B. To “double click” pretty much means to zoom into something and look at the details/data on a more granular level.
7. Which among these services cannot offer a freemium?
Answer: D! Because a freemium basically means a free trial to a paid subscription and Grab practices a pay-per-use business model.
8. What does Core Competency mean?
Answer: A, despite “competency” not directly translating to “strength,” the corporate world has dubbed it so.
9. What is synonymous to “What’s the carrot?”
Answer: A. When someone in the meeting room asks “What’s the carrot?” they are generally asking what the incentive is for people. For example, what do customers get if they were to sign up for a new insurance plan.
10. When someone asks, “Did it move the needle?” what are they really asking?
Answer: C. Companies want to generate a reaction from their clients, so if something doesn’t “move the needle,” officers generally don’t care for it.
11. If you’re on a “burning platform,” what does it mean?
Answer: B. You do not want to be on a burning platform—not even figuratively.
12. What is not part of a full customer journey?
Answer: D, exit! Why would you want your customer to exit at any point in time?
13. Which among these belong least in an email?
Answer: This was a giveaway. The answer is clearly D.
14. What is an “offline?”
Answer: C, but it might also mean “I have nothing to say right now but I will later.”
15. When discussing someone’s bandwith, what’re you actually talking about?
Answer: A, their capacity. It’s pretty much saying “This is how much they can handle on their plate.”
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Art Alexandra Lara