On love lost and love found
I personally blame it on The Notebook (2004), but if you binged on other romance films when you were young, then you might have grown up thinking another shot in love is worth the try. (Same, and no judgment here!) Whether the reconciliation is paved by grand gestures, accidental grocery encounters or sincere apologies, a lot of movies had many of us believing that second chances at love are sweeter and more rewarding.
But the thing is…the curated representations canned in cinemas are far, far different from how it is in real life—particularly when it comes to the complex and often painful reasons that prompt two hearts to separate. And with that, it leaves us with the lingering question: Could love really be sweeter the second time around?
Taking ex-sweethearts Elijah Canlas and Miles Ocampo as a good example, we may arrive at a conclusion that, even after fallout, exes can still be friends. More so, their recent interviews and social media gestures underscore that the possibility of getting back together is anchored mainly on their willingness to try.
On Elijah Canlas and Miles Ocampo’s efforts
Elijah and Miles have stayed amicable since their split in 2023, and no traces of grudges have been publicly displayed. Both have also been vocal about still having love for each other even after their separation.
It was Elijah who announced their split gently and without hostility. In an interview with ABS-CBN, he says, “I’m always going to have love for her, and I’m always going to support her in whatever she does. I’ll always be her number one fan, but right now, we’re just taking our time figuring out ourselves and our lives.”
Just as much, Miles weighs the good memories more invaluably than the breakup itself.
In a YouTube interview, Miles bares, “May pinag-samahan kami, matagal din kami. And kapag ganun na marami kayong pinagdaanan together, marami kayong happy memories together. Parang, I have so much love and respect for that person (We went through a lot, and we were together for quite a while. And if you go through a lot of experiences together, you have happy memories together. It’s because I have so much love and respect for that person).”
And lately, their lost romance is heading back to the surface, as there have been reports that the two are in constant effort to win each other back.
This alone indicates that the ex-couple is refusing to dwell on past wounds—regardless of how deep the cut is—and is instead focusing on rebuilding their foundations. With this healthy disposition of love, we may arrive at the understanding that second chances are what you make out of crumbs. More than the willingness to try, the fragments and ruins left become the crucial pieces that can put a romance back together.
So should you come back running to your ex?
Not necessarily, and it still depends on the circumstances. After all, there are romances that are better left buried. Those are the ones that died in disrespect, cheating and manipulation—and those are the kinds of love you are better off letting go of, rather than reviving it for yet another sleepless night.
Disrespect has so many layers and it takes a lot to unpack. But in a simpler sense, when the absence of amore prompts the other person to be impolite towards your feelings, then consider it as your green light to pack your bags and drive away—fast.
The same can be said for cheating. This has been a deal-breaker for many relationships and is considered the most notorious reason why so many romances ended up in flames. It’s actually self-explanatory because everyone knows infidelity is wrong on so many levels. So why would you subject yourself to another round of that?
Lastly: manipulation. It is silent. It lurks and preys and gets you without your knowing. Sadly, your light-bulb moment only comes after you’ve been swayed and bent many times over. But here is the good thing: patterns never lie, and realizing the tolls of manipulative dynamics can give one a sense of power to set boundaries and leave. So if you happen to crawl out of the tunnel black-and-blue, make sure never to look back.
@taylormhallman♬ linger . –
So yes, there is a kind of love that’s worth reviving—worth fighting for—but there are also the kinds that should stay six-feet under. As long as the reconciliation is within the promise of something healthy, then another try may do the relationship well this time.
Finding a glimmer of hope in love should be in consideration of the past and in making sure that boundaries are set and expectations are met. And in doing so, you may try to live by the words of a wise woman: “May your heart remain breakable but never by the same hand twice.”
Words Rod Hagen
Art Alexandra Lara
